Product Description Kids today are depressed and anxious. They also seem to feel entitled to every advantage and unwilling to make the leap into adulthood. As Polly Young-Eisendrath makes clear in this brilliant account of where a generation has gone astray, parents trying to make their children feel special are unwittingly interfering with their kids' ability to accept themselves and cope with life. Clarifying an enormous cultural change, THE SELF-ESTEEM TRAP shows why so many young people have trouble with empathy and compassion, struggle with moral values, and are stymied in the face of adversity. Young-Eisendrath offers prescriptive advice on how adults can help kids--through the teen and young adult years--develop self-worth, setting them on the right track to productive, balanced, and happy lives.
Customer Reviews:
A Treatise on How to Raise Kids October 11, 2008 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
The author emphasizes that we need to instill a sense of values without being overly self-conscious or critical. Our children should not be taught to be too risk averse or afraid to face the future.
Problems of low self-esteem can be dealt with via interdependence and collaborative efforts. Our conscience should be grounded in virtue and trust to do what is right. Our early childhood identities are affirmed and not necessarily changeable.
The primary emotions deal with the following:
o generosity toward others o discipline and self-control o patience o concentration o wisdom
There are different types of parental control. Laiseez-faire parents act only if the situation is unavoidable. They tend to be "laid back" in their overall approach to raising children.
Helicopter parents don't want the child to feel uncomfortable so they tend to be detached to some extent. Nevertheless, children need to acquire skills to deal with adversity as part of life. Excessive parental control or problem solving produces children unable to cope or make real decisions.
Parents should encourage empathy, role-reversal strategies, creativity, idealism and non-materialism. A child needs to affirm his/her identity early on. Parents should instill the notion of a conscience to do what is right and to give back to others and the community at large. Overall, the work is excellent in instructing parents on coping with child-rearing.
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